By DON BARNES
The national polls have presidential candidate Herman Cain in the lead today. He has a new television commercial that features his campaign manager Mark Block smoking a cigarette (smart move Herman….bound to get more TV coverage) and Tulsa’s own Krista Branch singing “I Am America”.
Good move. But, now if he could just locate all the former members of ACORN before the election next year he would have a better chance of winning. His new book will get him on Fox a lot.
The Homeland Security Department is trying to help the unemployment situation in America. They are looking for sex offenders to frisk people getting on airplanes. They don’t even have to pay them.
They say that the television cameras usually put about 10 pounds on a person’s weight. With Nancy Grace on Dancing With The Stars, must have been something wrong with the camera, because she looks about 50 pounds overweight. And, must have been one heckuva big closet that Chaz Bono came out of.
It was in the news today that President Obama is offering health care jobs for military veterans now. But, it is sad to say for too many of them it is literally costing them an arm or a leg.
The “mainstream media” has been covering the poor people who are pitching tents in New York City and other large cities all over the country labeling them as “Occupy Wall Street” protestors. The truth of the matter is they are folks who have had their homes foreclosed on.
The government put Bernie Madoff, the guy that lost $50 billion dollars, in prison for 150 years. Ain’t that a kick in the head. The people who are losing “trillions” coming down on a man who just lost $50 billion?
I understand that there are 27 million Muslims in America now. I suppose that means that Rosetta Stone will soon be offering an Arabic language course.
In a little town in Connecticut, the high school football team walked out of a school play that featured two gay guys kissing each other. Connecticut has recognized same sex marriages for three years now and I hear that their school textbooks now include “How To Go Gay for Dummies”.
Last Tuesday’s news on television mentioned that President Obama ordered the government to dismantle a bomb that would create a crater 700 feet deep and was 10 times bigger than the bomb dropped on Hiroshima, Japan. The site selected to do this is in Amarillo, Texas. I guess that was so if it went off prematurely he could blame it on George Bush.
The Michael Jackson trial is about to wrap up. And, most of the gambling casinos now have Michael Jackson slot machines in them. When you hit a jackpot it yells out “Thriller” and a white gloved hand comes out and grabs you and makes you do the moonwalk backwards.
It was also in the news the other day that the government is going to make it easier on home owners they foreclose on. Rather than 30 days they are now going to give them 60 days to vacate the homes.
Remember “Joe The Plumber” who was made popular during President Obama’s campaign in 2008? Part of Joe’s job has been cleaning out septic tanks. He’s thinking about running for president himself because he figures he is well qualified to “clean out the White House and congress”.
Texas Governor Rick Perry is campaigning with his idea of a “flat tax” being the answer to our taxation woes. His plan will do away with such things as the “death tax” and the “capital gains tax” and if you are living under the poverty level, you won’t have to pay any income taxes.
Doesn’t that take it about half of the country? Where is the money going to come from that the government gives away to all those foreign countries like Pakistan and China?
OK folks….got to get off of my “soap box” now and go rustle up a bologna sandwich. Pray Hard and Vote Smart and always remember: “In God We Trust”.
Don Barnes P.O. Box 602 Poteau, OK 74953 firstname.lastname@example.org www. Facebook.com/DonBarnes